


Doing It Doggy Style

by lord_garbage



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Bad Puns, Crack, Dadwald, Dogs, Fluff, Happy Ending, M/M, Nygmobbledog, Remix, Screenshots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-12
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-09-17 03:25:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 533
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16966788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lord_garbage/pseuds/lord_garbage
Summary: Ed decides to retaliate against Oswald's bulldog Edward by getting a poodle named Oswald. Things get complicated when the two pets start 'liking' each other more than they should.This is a screenshot-based remix of season 4 with dogs, a dash of romance, and a big helping of Dadwald.





	1. Oppa Doggy Style

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LemonKith](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LemonKith/gifts).



> The main inspiration for this story, obviously, was [Edward the Dog](https://www.instagram.com/p/Bmls6ZlHQMH/?taken-by=camaro_the_bulldog). However, this project wouldn't exist without my friend LemonKith and their remark about Ed getting a black poodle in order to spite Oswald.
> 
> This AU is set sometime after season 4, but it pretty much ignores everything that happened after 4x09 -- except for Ed's return to normal and Sofia getting the boot. This means that life goes on as usual. Once more, Oswald is at the top of Gotham's food chain, and Ed and Lee are still palling around in the Narrows. For all intents and purposes, Ed never developed a crush on Lee, and Oswald has legally adopted Martín.
> 
> Last but not least: You can also find this story [on Tumblr](https://oswald-poodlepot.tumblr.com/post/181054606537/continued-here).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**A few weeks later...**

 

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. I've spent the last few months working on this and I really hope someone will like it. :)


	2. When You Leashed Expect It

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who subscribed, kudos'd, and commented. I honestly didn't expect such a warm reception. In case anyone wonders, Oswald Poodlepot has a prosthetic leg.


	3. Karma Is A Bitch

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> From now on, things will get better. Less puns, more feels. Hope that's okay!


	4. Paradogsical

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're now slowly getting into Nygmobblepot territory. Hope you enjoy the ride!


	5. Puppy Love

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're getting closer! By the way, if anyone's wondering about Oswald's "out of town" remark: It's supposed to be a white lie to ensure he can monitor Ed's future contact with Martín.


	6. I Woof You

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Unless there are some major emergencies on my end, I will post the next two updates as usual. :)


	7. Pooch!... I Did It Again

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy holidays.


	8. I Wanna Be Your Dog

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, that happened. *sweats*


	9. In Doggo Pro Reo

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! The next update is going to be the last one. It will include a new chapter as well as a short epilogue in text form. I hope you enjoyed the ride. :)
> 
> I apologize if parts of this chapter seem a little abrupt. I was running out of scenes towards the end and, as a consequence, mainly focused on giving everybody their deserved happy ending.


	10. Puppily Ever After

 

 

 

**A week later...**

 

 

 

 

A day later, the following ad appears in the _Gotham Gazette_...

 

 

 

 

 

 

**A few months later...**

 

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**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the happiest thing I've ever written. The last chapter is a short epilogue in text form.


	11. Epidogue

Oswald keeps his promise and starts lobbying for Lee’s Narrows hospital project as soon as the public commotion over his engagement dies down. Lee even gets him to invest a large sum of his own money merely by offering to finally give Martín a comprehensive answer to his repeated questions about where puppies, as well as human babies, come from. This, in turn, later leads to Lee naming one of the hospital wings after Oswald's mother, Gertrud Kapelput, thereby publicly cementing her status as one of Gotham's very few saints.

Ed’s collaboration with PetSmart turns out to be more successful than anybody anticipated. Among other things, they produce a series of care products specially designed for poodles and poodle mixes under the label of _Poodle me this!_. Ed even goes as far as to introduce a monthly Canine Conundrum Challenge event at the Riddle Factory that entirely consists of dog-related riddles and puns. But perhaps Ed's biggest personal feat -- aside from getting Oswald to marry him, of course -- is Lucius Fox's acceptance of Foxy the Puppy as a gift of professional respect.

Almost fifteen months later, Oswald and Ed marry. Philip "Lefty" Jenkins and Maurice "Mo" Taylor, the two pharma representatives, serve as the rapping invitation messengers and -- despite the personal protection from both the Penguin and the Riddler -- it remains a miracle that nobody kills them in the process. James Gordon is one of the few invited guests who sadly cannot make it to the festivities. He sends a card instead that reads, “Congratulations on your spousal privilege.”

Martín grows up to be a more well-adjusted young man than many predicted. For one, he manages to graduate successfully from school, even though Martín the Dog eats his homework on more than one occasion. Martín is 25 and a student at Gotham University when Ed finally adopts him. While the majority of children are unable to choose their parents, Ed reasons that the best he can do is to give Martín the opportunity to make his own informed decision on the subject. And Martín does -- in less than ten seconds.

Oswald Poodlepot and Edward the Dog don't have any more puppies after the first litter. Their owners make sure of it. Barbara Kean has a field day with that knowledge and her castration jokes leave Oswald and Ed both flustered for at least a month.

Gerti and Eli are the most rambunctious dogs of the bunch. Olga hates them with a passion and vows every time they raid the kitchen to throw them into her next hearty dog goulash. To make perfectly sure this day never comes, Oswald insists to consistently increase her salary. After a few months, she deservedly earns as much as his most trusted top-level lieutenants.

Jimbo -- or, more precisely, Jimbo's poor potty training -- is the reason why the GCPD soon introduces a city-wide dog ban at all precincts. The anecdote becomes a favorite among Gotham’s rogues and is retold at practically every GCPD office party in the following years -- much to the dismay of one Jim Gordon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who stuck with this story until the very end. :)
> 
> This project wouldn't have been possible without LemonKith, Edward the Dog, and 4x15, the episode that reignited my Nygmobblepot love. I am also incredibly thankful to every reader who left kudos and/or comments and thereby made posting my awkward doodles and terrible rap attempts an all-around enjoyable experience. 
> 
> I wish everyone a happy, healthy new year and lots of fun with Gotham's new season!

**Author's Note:**

> This story is also available on Tumblr at [@oswald-poodlepot](https://oswald-poodlepot.tumblr.com/).


End file.
